Reality check

I have many brothers and sisters. I remember being in high school and not beng to do any after school activities because I had to come home and babysit at least one of them. It really wasn't that bad. I'd have to say that I learned so much and built up many "mommy" skills. In fact, with both of my sisters, I was so close and available to them that to this day my youngest sister still slips up and calls me Mom. She's 7, so it's pretty easy to make a mistake like that, but the point is, I felt like a second mom to them. As my mom used to wake up when someone would call, or be ill in the night, pretty soon it was my ears that were trained to hear these things and I was the first one to the scene. I'd strip the bed, calm the fears, whatever it was. Not because my mom wouldn't, because she did, it was just something that I could take care of so I did. Sister #1 had ear infections throughout her life, she'd cry all night and we'd share a room, I calmed her many nights. She had trouble breathing sometimes too. I would wake up instantly if she skipped a breath. Coming back from a car trip, she looked pale in her car seat, I saw her begin to heave so I instinctly cupped my hands under her mouth. Sister #2 was colic and I'd stay up with my mother, in shifts to walk the house with her because you could not put her down. Walking sometimes until past midnight, on a school night.

So, you see, the decision to have kids for me is really simple. Since the time I've moved out and the time Aaron and I start our family is a break for me. It's my vacation time.

Aaron's story is quite different than mine. He only has one sister who is older than he, so he didn't have anyone younger to take care of. Therefore, he surrounded himself with friends and often times, they were younger than he was. He just got along with them better. I watch the way he interacts with kids in my family, friends kids, and as he would say, he's "like a junle gym to them." And he is, he isn't affraid to get down and dirty in a sandbox, dig out the toys in the toybox or just provide a lap of comfort when needed. He desperately wants kids of his own.

Therefore, we will. I hear it takes a cople of months to go back to a normal "cycle", so that will bring us to the wedding and then we're putting it in God's hands. I'm not naive to the fact that we still need to take "other" precautions, however, we're counting the days until the wedding, and then hoping for the best.

Yesterday, my younger sister said to my mom that she wanted a younger sister, if she waits a little bit, that younger sister just might turn out to be a neice......

 
Thanks for all the good wishes, and kind words. I can't wait to share the news the day we find out.....